The other night I went out with some friends. These are newish friends and are a lot of fun. So anyway, they invite their friends. I invite my friends. Its a friends of friends of friends party essentially.
And I meet men. Plural.
As statistics go, it was about normal. Most were married. Some were gay. A few were single.
One of the married men is a friend of mine already. We've been flirting innocently for months. I've met his wife and think she's pretty awesome... well when she's not on a soapbox.. but then I suppose I'm not all that awesome when I'm on mine either. They're a great couple though, and the flirting is just a little fun. Though I have to say, should he suddenly be single.. that might change. (insert sly wink here)
I do have to say though that when she joked about trading him in for a younger model, I nearly grabbed him and put a dibs on him myself. I was a little tipsy at the time. Luckily just a little tipsy. He's taken. I get it and I admire it. Doesn't make him any less eye candy though.
The gay guy was well.. wow. He wasn't over the top gay. Just looking at him he looked like any ordinary completely gorgeous manly athletic straight man. Seriously HOT. And then he spoke.
He didn't have a huge lisp or a feminine voice really, so it wasn't a huge giveaway to the general public. However, he was all about "fabulous" with the appropriate inflections, and friendly in a platonic fun way that only happily married men and men who completely aren't interested in you and have no concerns at all that you might be. He was fun and engaging, and I soooo want him.. as my new best friend. :)
However almost immediately after entering the bar, I noticed this guy. He was dressed like I like em. Button down shirt, slacks, nice shoes. Yes I totally get off on business attire. Shut up.
He however looked like he was good friends maybe more with a friend of mine. So I backed off initially. He was buying her drinks and I assumed they were together.
We talked a bit about his job which is unrelated to anything I do, and Hock immediately was in his wallet and giving me his card. I didn't ask for it nor did I show extra interest in what he did thus provoking a card. He just gave me one.
This got my thoughts going, and I started doubting that they were more than friends. Maybe I was crazy, but I felt slightly hit on. I shrugged it off and moved on to mingle elsewhere.
My girl friends however were way ahead of me drinking. They were off flirting and groping strange men and men they knew.
"So you're having a butt grabbing game?"
"Yes, you should join us! Go grope someone.." they replied as they scoped the room looking for a victim for me.
"Umm I'm way not drunk enough for that yet. Let me go catch up."
Thus the tone of the night was set, and I got tipsy despite all efforts at self-control. Ok, there wasn't much effort at self-control.
I mingled. I flirted. Single. Married. Gay. I flirted, and I drank.
Then I ran into Hock again. This time we talked more, played bar games together, and flirted.
We drifted apart each mingling in different areas of the bar, and met up again. Flirted, and I wrapped my arm around his waist. He put his arm around me.
This is where things got fuzzy. Up until this point, I wasn't sure if he was or was not into me. He was laid back, relaxed, and non-aggressive. I normally assume this to be not interested.
However our exchange while our bodies were close and touching was anything but platonic. He'd mentioned several times in absolute seriousness that he was just out for fun right now. I got the impression that there was more to it, some kind of lingering pain or psychosis that he'd not worked through yet. But fun.. sounded fun.
He asked if I wanted to take this somewhere else. I honestly can't remember if the question was go somewhere else like another bar, or if it was a go have sex question. I know I answered it as the latter.
"How about your place?"
"Ok. Let me close out."
He was sweet and polite, and it confused me. I think I might be a little jaded. I waited while he went to the bar to close out.
He was polite the entire way out. We left arm in arm and he walked me back to my car as he told me his address. Not once did he ask for my number. So I assumed this was one night stand fun. I'd already figured that out by his mention of just wanting to have fun.
He then began to "sell" me on himself in an awkward insecure kind of way. Essentially telling me that he's more than financially sound, and talking about his political beliefs (which were sexy btw)... I honestly felt like telling him..
"Dude I'm in this for the sex. Your trust funds, stock portfolio, or whatever matter not. You said fun, not dating. Are you changing your mind now?"
But I didn't. I merely told him that his finances mattered not at all to me.
We get to my car and we kiss. He's a good kisser, but kind. Gentle. I know I'm a good kisser, and I know I know how to provoke a man into being an animal. So I tried. We were getting hot and heavy, but the more I tried to provoke him the more docile he seemed to get, and the more turned on.
I admit having power over a man sexually is pretty damn awesome, but on a one night stand kind of fun thing.. I'm not used to being in charge. I'd much rather the guy pin me to the wall and take me. But the more I tried to encourage it, the less it seemed to happen.
At one point I even remarked to him about it, hinting that I thought he was taking the backseat, being a submissive, or whatever. If he'd have verbally owned it, I'd have taken charge.. but he insisted that he could be the animal just not in the public setting we were in. He promised if I came to his place that he'd show me.
So after about an hour or so of making out and causing a public scene. More than once being told to "get a room". No clothes came off.. just kissing. I told him I'd meet him at his place. I reminded him that he didn't have my number, and he replied with, "well you have my card right?"
Weird.
So I go to meet him at his place but stop off at my apt quickly first to freshen up. My makeup is all over the place and my nose was beet red from his 5 o'clock shadow. I needed some major fixing. I also slipped on some sexy lingerie.
I also felt my "illness" acting up.. the one I've mentioned in previous posts. Its actually a "condition" not an illness, so not communicable.. but nevertheless I took my meds and hoped that would put an end to the symptoms and let me have a good couple hours of sex. He promised just a fun thing, so I figured I just needed to be symptom-free for a few hours.
I get to his place. He apologizes for its state (which is cleaner than my place btw). We resume kissing and find our way to the bedroom.
What happened was not what I was prepared for.. and maybe you readers can help me by letting me know if this is normal or if I'm crazy.
I tease and taunt, but still he's being docile and sweet. I began to wonder where this animal in him was hiding and if I was ever going to see it. I initiated him taking his clothes off and he did. I took my outer clothes off and left my lingerie and bra on, he never bothered to take off either one and left it completely up to me. I don't know if I'd have left them on if he'd ever have initiated me removing them. As it was, it was I that initiated and removed my own bra and panties, but the lacy camisole stayed on out of my own curiosity if he'd ask me to remove it. He did not. It was strange being so in charge of everything. Yet he told me constantly how hot I was and how sexy he found me.
He was sweet the whole time, so much so that it tugged at my heart and I thought about dating him. He'd mentioned that he'd not done this in a long time, and the way he said it made me believe him.
The sex was awkward. He would get going. I'd get going, and just as I was really getting going, he'd stop. He did this once, twice, threetimes.. I started to get very fucking annoyed. So I asked him about it, and he said he was doing it on purpose to tease me..
"I wondered when you'd notice"
Seriously wanted to beat him, but he knocked it off and go going. Still it felt more like we were trying to make love rather than fuck. It was weird. The roughest he got was with sucking/biting my neck, which he ended up giving me a hickey.
When we were finished, he wanted talk. Chat. Chit Chat. Converse. He wanted me to ask him about himself. To get to know him. WTF? After sex, I'm lucky to be able to form words. He told me how beautiful and sexy I was. (He did amit after sex that his whole starting/stopping thing wasn't intentional. I didn't ask for more details but I should have.)
Then he wanted to cuddle. Really cuddle. Not just that after sex little cuddling thing, but cuddle like you would in a real relationship. Sweetly.
My head was seriously trying to wrap my mind around it. I wanted to lecture him that he can choose "fun" or a "relationship" but he really needs to be more clear about what he wants.
He wanted me to spend the night. He wanted to sleep cuddling. I tried to acquiesce but I am not a sleeping cuddler. I'll cuddle. I'll sleep. But unless I'm dead tired, I don't do both at the same time.. especially not without being in a real relationship.
Finally I tell him that I need to sleep and I roll away. He falls asleep before I do, and starts snoring. Adorably he sleeps with a pillow over his face to muffle the sound. Seriously how adorable is that?
Then my "condition" started acting up. I could feel it was going to be bad. My stomach started to hurt, and I was going to need to use the restroom. More than that though, I was holding onto a fart that was going to be huge... if it was just a fart, might be more disgusting than that.
There was NO WAY IN HELL I was going to let it go at his place. He was sweet and nice, and if I wanted any hope of this happening again or possibly some kind of relationship thing in the future... I needed to go home. But I also didn't want to be that person that ditches someone.
I had to wake him up, and I felt like a bitch for doing. I tossed all sorts of reasons of why I couldn't stay around my head. Telling him I had a huge fart was not going to happen.
So I woke him telling him that I couldn't sleep and needed to go home. He insisted I could sleep there, pleading. I insisted that I needed to go home.
I felt like an ass.
He got up and showed me out. Giving me a tender hug and a kiss as we said our goodbyes.
He still didn't ask for my number. I did email him the next day with a thank you and my number. We've text flirted a bit since and hinting at doing it again someday.
But this was not what I'd call a "fun thing", and I get the impression that he's much more of a relationship man. Maybe I'm wrong.
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