SXSW: Twitter, Dating, & Douches

The remainder of SXSW was relatively uneventful. The dating bloggers and I never met up. That made me sad, and a little angry, but c'est la vie.

I did get to meet the guy who decided not to have me on his dating panel. It was all about using Twitter for dating, and advice and discussion of that.

After two seconds of entering the panel room I understood why I wasn't on it.

1. He's the biggest douchebag.

2. She was one of those tiny digital prima-donnas.

Ok.. so I'm being judgy.

I just got a little miffed when someone asked for advice on what photo to use to help them increase dating interest. The panel let people in the audience answer and give advice.. but the minute I referenced OkCupid's research on the best photos to use in online dating.. I was interrupted.

It did not matter that I was expressing research on what photos people found the most attractive and approachable.. no no.. I mentioned "online dating".  I was summarily told that this was not "Online Dating", and I was so shocked by the rudeness and obvious "WTF crack are you on" situation that I just sat there with my mouth open and silent for a few minutes as they moved on to someone else.

Dear Douchebag,

Twitter is online. You're discussing dating on it. Thus this is online dating.  Sure sure twitter is not solely purposed as an online dating site, but make no mistake, its online dating.

One of the great things though about using Twitter for dating is that you can get a better sense of what that person is like than you would on an online dating site. On Twitter you get to see how they interact with others. Are they universally friendly? Do they play favorites? Are they childish and block people for silly things? Are they only tweeting at midnight, or is it an all day thing (aka are they an addict)?

Twitter can reveal much more about you than most sites.. but if you're using it to date.. you're doing online dating.

So.. please remove that elitist stick from your rectum. 

Thanks,

Maruska

I did try to introduce myself to him after the panel and say hi.. remind him who I was, etc. He would have none of it, and didn't care to even say hi. I was totally ignored. We're "Friends" on Facebook, WTF? I wasn't expecting a hug and kiss and a huge "we need to catch up" party, but for fuck's sake at least acknowledge that I'm a human being.

So I decided to pester him whenever I saw him the rest of the conference. Seriously, if I saw him, I'd make a point to say hello to him all excited as if we knew each other really well and haven't seen each other in ages. After the first 24 hours, I could tell he was just a little freaked out by it (I was seriously making scenes by yelling his name across the crowded hallways, and he was giving me wide berths). Pretty certain he thought I was some kind of stalker with a crush.  MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA

So Monday night rolls around and I head to a party with some local friends. I enter and find my friends and right next to them is Mr Douchebag.  So I turn to one of the guys in my group, and I start sounding off about how much that guy is a douchebag and why. (Mr Douchebag is not from Austin. It was a crowded bar, so I figured it was circumstance that he was there not that he was being social with my group)  My friend turns to me, and says:

"Him?"

"Yes.. the douche who just went up the stairs"

"Oh he's a good guy. I used to work with him."

I wanted to crawl in a hole. I went off about this guy to the only person in my entire circle in Austin who possibly could have known this guy. Great!  Turns out they were pretty good pals.

Funny thing though.. after inserting my foot way far into my mouth.. my friend yelled to the douchebag, who had moved across the room, to say something unrelated to him, and the douchebag then saw that I was friends with his friend.

The entire remainder of SXSW, if I saw Douchebag.. it was he who would smile and say hi to me.

F ' ing Prick.

SXSW: The Non-Date Date

The second day of SXSWi was interesting and exhausting. There were several dating bloggers in town for SXSWi, and I was hoping to meet them. Some were people that I didn't know well, and others were people that I'd talked to relatively often. I also love meeting people from online and seeing what they're really like in person.  You know to see if my idea of who they are matches who they really are.

I'm not usually very far off, but sometimes I'm surprised.

So I tried to get the ball rolling on meeting, and got one of them to bite, and waited for them to tell me what party they were going to, so I could meet them there.

In the meantime, I went to various parties. Most were boring. Since I found most people at SXSWi intimidating, I'm wasn't really that outgoing. I wasn't quite the wallflower either, but interupting cliques to introduce myself.. not really my style, especially since I could not think of an interesting thing to say. 

So I ended up waiting in line at this party that was about over. One of the things I was disappointed about at SXSWi is that most of the parties, whether you RSVP'd ahead of time, whether or not you had a badge, you still had to wait in freaking line for at minimum 20 minutes to enter, sometimes you'd wait an hour.

I don't do waiting in line. Yes, I know that makes me sound "priveledged" or "snooty", but since standing in line generally leaves my feet in horrid pain... I'd rather just walk to someplace relaxed that doesn't require people to queue up. I'd rather be "unpopular" and happily sipping a beer, than be "seen" at the popular spot with sore feet and pressing my way through the crowd to fight for the bartenders attention so I can get a beer.

So, anyway, I'm waiting in this line which was about 5 people. I figured it wouldn't be too long of a wait. The guy in front of me was kinda cute, and I was thinking of something to say to him when he got out of line and started to leave.

So I jumped on it and asked him where he was headed. He told me about this party.  He said it wasn't far away that it was going to be huge. Rather than stand there alone, I invited myself to go with him. I believe I worded it as asking him if I could tag along, but I really wasn't giving him much choice in the matter. He seemed more than happy to have the company.

We talked on the walk there. The walk, by the way, seemed to get longer and longer until I finally got it pulled up on my phone map and saw just how far we were going. Around the corner, it was not! We were close enough to it by the time I pulled up the map that I just went anyway, but had I known how far it was from the start, I'd have chickened out. Bauk Bawk Begauk

Josh was new to town. A programmer. He had a sweet masculine voice, a great laugh, and that jewish-meditereanean look I really like. Dark hair, light eyes, and man hair. We talked. We laughed. And even though I was whiny, he took it in stride and didn't ditch me despite his many chances.

We waited in line for about a half hour and he got me to talk about my project, and he gave me some really good tips on how to get started on it. We also exchanged contact info so I could contact him if I ever got funding enough to hire him.

After getting in, he waited in line for drinks with me, and kept me company as I searched for the water. We essentially had a little "date" out of it. A non-date date I suppose the term is. 

At one point, I attempted to mingle. I saw a lost soul standing nearby and said hi. I introduced the guy to Josh and we all talked together. 

Unfortunately this lost soul was lost for a reason. He was a moron with money. He was a venture capitalist who.. well.. doesn't know his ass from his asset. About 1/3 way through the conversation, I stopped talking as I realized that this guy just liked to hear himself talk. A blow hard. He would argue his point no matter how wrong he was. Josh however kept talking to him, so I smiled and noded and waited. 

Finally I interupted to tell Josh that I was going to get a new drink. Josh said he'd come with me, and we said goodbye to the lost ass.  As we were walking away, Josh said called the guy a moron. 

"Oh phew! For a minute there I thought you were talking to him because you thought he offered some kind of merit. I was worried about you."

He laughed, "No, I was just fucking around with him. For shits and giggles."

We both laughed, then sought some more free drinks. 

We stayed a while longer but never talked to anyone else. (I mean who can blame me? I had an attractive intelligent man to talk to, and if the other people there were anything like the lost ass it wasn't worth the risk.)

Despite us talking about online dating (he asked what I blogged about, so I said online dating) he never mentioned that he wasn't single and I'm still not used to actively looking for rings. I guess I've not been single long enough? But towards the end of the night, I noticed a shiny ring on his finger and I wondered.

We were having a great time, so it mattered not. When I was ready to call it a night, he left with me and walked me back to my parking garage. 

How sad it is that my best date in a long while was with a married guy? 

SXSW: First Day

So .. I attended SXSW or as I'll from now on call it.. GeekWatch 2010. It was wall to wall sexy geeks, plus a few douchebags. Ok, quite a few douchebags, but they were easy to detect and avoid. 

I went to SXSW alone as most of my friends here did not go, so it was interesting and self-revealing.

I learned about myself:

1. I'm not good at new places, with new people, if I'm even in the least worried about making a good impression. (if I honestly don't care what people think, I'm fine, but SXSW is full of potential employers and I don't want to really piss anyone off)

2. I can only network for a very short amount of time before I start to go insane.

3. I really have no tolerance for uppity, snooty, or otherwise douchebaggy people.

But I get ahead of myself.

Friday.. 

After a day of attending panels, I decided to attend a few free parties. I mean its free food and booze, why not? I'm dead tired from panels and chatting with strangers all day (networking), but I go anyway.

On my way to one of the parties, I see a man in a suit sitting on the side of the pavement. He's looks geeky and cute, has a SXSW badge, and looks amazingly lost. 

"Hi, are you lost? Need help finding something?" I ask.

"No, I'm ok. I'm just looking for something to eat. You don't happen to know Austin?"

"Yeah, I live here." (I kinda lied. I live in Austin, but I wasn't that familiar with that part of town.)

"Do you know where there's a good place for food?" 

"Well that depends. What are you in the mood for?" (I get out my iPhone to look stuff up.)

"I could go for a good burger."

"Well then you need to go to Casino El Camino. Best burgers in town. Trust me."

He wanted directions, and of course I pulled out my iPhone and showed him the map. We flirted a bit, and he did not seem in a hurry to pull away.

I gave him my card and told him to call me if he needed anything else. I smiled and we headed our separate ways.

I went to the party I'd planned on, and found myself hot and bored. It must have been 90 in that building and stuffy. I left after making a round to look for friends, then headed to Casino. Maybe I could non-chalantly run into Muso (the guy from earlier).

(blah blah blah walking)

I open the door to Casino, and find myself blinded.  It was dark with bright lights and it took me a minute to adjust.  However, in the corner of my eye I see someone waving, and then I hear..

"HI"

Its Muso.  So much for a casual run in. No excuse of "Oh I just stopped by with a few friends.. who just happen to be in the other room" ... nope.. he sees me enter alone.

I suppose I could have pretended to look for some friends in the back, but disoriented by the lights and tired, I wasn't thinking that straight.  

Plus, Muso asked me to sit in the seat next to him and my feet hurt so I did.

We talked for hours. Laughed. Talked about where we were from, the conference, and plans we had next.

He was going to another party, and I was headed home. (The poor dog had been cooped up for way too many hours)

We left and walked together until our ways parted, at which point he said we should keep in touch.  I reminded him that he had my card.  He pulled out his wallet, and my card from his pocket.. and put my card in his wallet.

He said he'd definitely contact me.

I only half believed him, and went home.